Suddenly, the smile comes

Suddenly, I have something to say! You didn't know that I didn't have anything to say before, but it's true. I was dry. Angst-ridden. Unsettled for days. I don't have fun sharing that part, so I skim over it and typically post cute baby shots to distract you.


Only, it's hard to get cute baby shots when said baby is lap-bound. Poor, poor ferklempt baby. His itty-bitty mind cannot comprehend where the kids have gone and why they are not here to delight, entertain and toss him around.

I am a poor substitute for a growling squeezing big sister that greets him with a lit-up face and arms wide open. Or another sister that is chattery and patronizing and wants to dress him up. Or a giant brother who carries him around and opens doors and shares forbidden snacks on tall forbidden furniture.


Poor, poor boy. Small lonely boy. Even now, he wanders around looking out of windows, keening puppy-like and searching. And as a compass to north, returns to my side. "Da! Da! Day! This! Sit!" he beckons me back to the giant comfy recliner. I give in again and again, curling him into me, trying to soothe his little self.


His right thumb steals softly into his mouth. His left arm curls around my neck, fingers trailing into my hair. Ah. Silence. This will do for the moment. He is pleased. I am pleased. Minutes pass and momentarily calmed, he climbs down again to explore.


And we begin again.


I have watched this unfold for 8 days, and read yesterday about a similar sweet tale. I wonder how long it will take for a new routine to emerge. I have no self-portraits of my lap-curled boy and I, but something else fun has happened.


Hence the title of the smile coming. I won a cd of what will certainly be great tunes, from a blogger I really enjoy! The week is looking up. A shot of luck seems to have that effect...