books and bottoms

It was a plan that came together. A little escape to Grown-Up Land. It was a visit to the Decatur Book Festival to hear my favorite author speak! You may have noticed the tiny wee ticker to the side, counting down not only the days until her next release, but the hours and minutes. Whee!

Diana Gabaldon (rhymes with stone) has been one of my favorite authors for about 8 years. In fact, I first read a book of hers in August of 2000. And if you think I remember the date and place of every book I read, I can assure you it is not so. That may be the *only* series I remember exactly where and when I was when I found it. Out of hundreds.

A ringing endorsement? Surely. But she's not for the faint-hearted, since her books tend toward tome-size and you need to cheerily sing Sir Mix-a-Lot's tune to the words "I like..... big books and I cannot lie..."

So off I rolled with a pal in tow, to hear Diana speak and read a bit from her upcoming latest addition to the Outlander series, An Echo in the Bone. She began with a raunchy 18th century joke and ended with a spicy scene from The Book. And as we left the sanctuary (I don't call it that because I love her - we were actually in a sanctuary), Dana turned to me with pink cheeks and said "I see why you like those books!"

And yet, the more shocking expose of the occasion was the young lady in front of us, who was of a generous size. In her haste to get to Diana's speech, she appeared to have forgotten both her undergarments and some shorts that actually fit. And each time she stood up to adjust her tiny swatch of khaki clothing, she treated us to the fullest moon I have seen outside of a bathtub. It is a simple fact, that unless you are a trained medical professional, receiving payment, that sort of view is really unnecessary. But much like roadkill, it was difficult to look away, and even more difficult not to giggle riotously. I floated the idea that the song-line "teach your children well" may have been referring to proper use of clothing items.

Then along we went, to stroll the streets and eventually wander into Javamonkey. Where I thought we were having coffee, but was informed we were having wine. And it was tasty and just right for the day. Though it took a moment to adjust to not having to tuck tags, wipe mouths or shush small voices... it was thoroughly enjoyable to sip and chat in a wine bar with a view of a poetry-reading outside and the city's mix of pedestrians meandering along the sidewalk.

A few hours out of the norm does a body good.