No thanks, I don't have that much to share

Or do I? Does anyone feel such an abiding excitement over my every waking thought, that they would follow me? Await my every Tweet?

Yes, I'm talking about Twitter. The national obsession. The craze of over-informing.

No, I won't be a Twitterer.

Never mind that brevity is not my strong suit... at 140 characters or less, a Tweet is less than brief. It is cryptic. No, upon close inspection, my daily encounters uncensored are not for the masses.

My hypothetical Tweets each day would be something like this

Hypothetical #1: "Just walked in on another drive-by poo."

(that's what I call it when they poo and walk away, no paper, no flush, just results.)

Hypothetical #2: "OK, if not all 3 , let's at least shoot for 1 of 3. Wipe, flush OR wash."

Hypothetical #3: "The Real Left Behind Series: evidence of a trip to the toilet... preschooler-style."

I know. Their current preoccupation with potty humor has infected me. And no one needs daily scatological Tweets. Let's just move along to Earth Day -

Happy Day, Earthlings!

I saw a bumper sticker that made me smile, and then made me think really hard. Uh-oh. Here's to deep thoughts for you, too.

Throw it away?

There is no away...