On the eve of adventure

This is my official "out of office" memo. You know, since you're like, my office. Or something. Well, whatever, I feel like I can't just up and go anywhere without the appropriate notice given. You're on notice! (I love Colbert)
So when I return from whence I goeth, you will know and see and we will be joyful. Or something. That's the point, right? A friend once told me that he looked up the definition of "fun" and it was listed as: a departure from the ordinary.
Well, amen to that!
Depart, we will.
Ordinary, we will not.

Mmmm-wah, see ya when I see ya!

Book Time

How this book has been around since 1999, and never run into me, I do not know. I should browse the young adult section more.
Nevertheless, read this. Today. It's short, ya'll, even if I do have speed-reading superpowers.
When I finished it, I was teary-eyed and sighed: "That is one of the sweetest books I have ever read..."

the perks of being a wallflower by stephen chbosky
(even if you saw the movie, you know what I will say. Movie, schmovie.)

Scenes of Summer

Some days I feel quite super-mom-ish, and we have projects we work on. I organize the table for a craft and stand around directing and overseeing. Craft Instructor, don't you know. Other times they have an idea in mind, and I search and scrape together the necessary random objects. But most days, the ideas and collecting and preparing are their own, and the results are fairly entertaining. And I try to be a big girl and not mind the messes, since they are after all, on Summer Break. On other days all together, I work on my own projects and only hear their noises in the background. I keep my spidey-sense tuned for sounds that appear unsafe. Like, hanging over the stairwell. Or microwaving things that should not perhaps be microwaved. Or mysterious bumps from the garage that sound suspiciously like someone climbing a wall or a pipe attached to a wall. Spidey-sense, wall-climbing has been detected!
Here are the scenes of the First Three Weeks, wonder which activities were sponsored by B?!

Host your own Auburn picnic today! We have props.

Oddly, his "gell" bias is nowhere in sight when it comes to paint. He had to have  pink like his best friend.

You know you want a cereal-box backpack. Admit it. Then you, too, can have your cabinet full of bags of cereal. 

This lean-to is still in the driveway. I can't dismantle that type of creativity. Sorry neighbors! Welcome, hobo!

This awesome racetrack is not still in the driveway. I've overcome being The Crusher, remember?

At our house, we eat hummus with our shades on. 

Mr. Cutie-Smartie-Pants. 

Summerus Blogatus Hiatus

I know, right? A post entitled "End of an Era" and then I am MIA for weeks. Were you skeert? Thought I was gone for good?
I am calling it Summerus Blogatus Hiatus. A ridiculous fancy title for Busy Me. The summer, she is in full force. We started with a bang. By yesterday, the kids were just spinning in a field, getting dizzy. Stop the fun! It's too much!
We're working into a smooth outline of days. So far only 2 things happen with regularity: My workouts at the Y, and Fiesta Wednesday. That is another fancy title for "Go to the pool in the afternoon with a neighbor, take food, and stay until 7:30." We both have husbands that are away mid-week, so, Fiesta Wednesday it is. When we really want to mix it up, we go to the Y pool instead of the neighborhood one. I know, livin' large, those Lears...
This morning my Mom called. She said since I am trying to break into the book biz, she has a topic for me. She would like me to write an informational children's series entitled "Guinea Gayle." Guess who the star would be! Hint: I don't know much about guineas. Hint: She has guineas and knows a lot about them. Outcome: I suggested she get right on it.
She has several guinea hens on nests now, so you know what that means... chicks again, for our July visit to NC! Of course, one of the nests came to her attention when the mother hen was spotted pecking madly at a snake in the yard. Is it just me, or do snakes love the guinea meat?? Mom claims the snakes are always sneaking around, we just never knew it until she had guineas taking them out left and right. Mom also claims the her dog Gulliver is a rising star of Snake Watch. Both of these remarks make me certain that I will be asking my uncle if I can stay at his house. Snakeland 2012, I will not be attending.
In other news, here is what I hear each morning from Jadyn: What are we going to do today? I don't know what to do.
I've started shushing her before she can even get the phrase out. Better yet, I say it FOR her and try to make her laugh thereby distracting her and in fact answering her question. This is the only thing I can plan for, we will try to make each other laugh. Try hard, now! Mama needs you!

 Has anybody seen Buzz Lightyear? Anyone?? Buzz??

I have named them Buzz, Buzz Jr., and Buzz Jr-Jr - what else could I call that tiny one?

Look, I built a GIANT tower...

Do I even need to say it? Anyone?

All together  now: it's the leaning tower of...

End of an Era

 The 5th grade grad... complete with honor role medal

Itz me ya'll, me and my boy-o.

The morning had a few "lasts" and I was the only one at the house recognizing them. Last time Cole would be riding the bus with his sisters, last time he would go to the same school with them, last time to see his elementary teachers (most of them are leaving or have already left for other schools)...

I had an amount of sentimentality, seasoned by a staggering dose of reality: with Phoenix starting PreK this fall at the school, I will have 7 more years there. Oh, they'll get their pound o' flesh out of me, that's for sure. 6 years in, 7 more to go - seems like I should get a parking spot, or at least a lunch wrap named after me? No? Ok. I'll just take the "Thank you Volunteer!" breakfast and Hershey bar. 

We segued from the formality and air of a promotion ceremony, to the tomfoolery of Cole's 11th Birthday Pool Party. Cue hilarity and hyper-activity.

And for the finale, I got to take my unpaid sick leave, and have a day of rest.

Again, friends, The End!

By popular demand: Butts

I feel like there should be some disclaimer, or that I should over-compensate for this post. I mean, Cole does many outstanding things, and yet I blog about his butt drawing? That's just the way we roll. I neglect to take pictures or mention that he was promoted to a baseball All Star team this week... rarely talk about his school success...never mention his projects in the 5th grade gifted class...
But butts? Oh yeah. Butts I will show you.
And so without further ado (aDOO??), I give you...

Things That Look Like Butts, by Cole

 You got your button butt, your watermelon butt, your flower butt...

 Your glasses butt, your cloud butt...

If there is anything that will make these kids laugh hilariously, it is an innocuous object being turned into a butt.
The END

Words of the day

I had a few ideas running through my head, to write about today. But guess what won out? Leaving the house a-l-o-n-e for a bit! It was a worthy day to celebrate, as today was the first day in 3 weeks that every Lear child woke up fever-free. Move along, spring virus. Your work here is done.

Here's my collection for the day, of things the small people said to me, when they were asked what are their favorite things that I do with them or for them:

"I like how you keep us safe, by not letting us ride in the road." (go, me!)
"I like that you tell us to not eat too much candy, or junk food, so we stay healthy." (wot? deep!)
"I like your hugs & kisses."
"Bock-a-doodle-head."
"We cannot live without love." (oh wise child)
"Hick-a-dee, hick-a-doo!" ( small nut)
"What? Tell you ALL the things I like?? That would take forever!" (that child, she knows how to play)

Jadyn had been bursting to give me some cards and drawings she had made, in which I appear to be wearing a fashionable triangular dress, in my favorite color blue. We were celebrating with what appeared to be a triple layer wedding-type cake, with many decorations, and possibly small birds on it. That girl goes big. Isabella had wrapped up my favorite cd of French bistro tunes, and when I opened it and started laughing, she did jazz hands and said "Don't you love it?!" Can't go wrong with a cd I already own, now can you? I say not. Cole drew a picture that will have to wait for a later date, so I can scan it. He said it was not *really* a Mother's Day drawing, and with the title "Things that look like butts" I hope that's true. Small Phoenix got to present the flowers and massage certificate, which my clever husband procured.

After various and sundry other loving comments, interspersed with many lively rounds of sibling bickering, our day was rounded out. It's better than I didn't attempt any epic Mother's Day writings, as being nursemaid for many long days and sick nights has fried my brain. No fear! Summer is almost here! My brain would have been fried shortly anyway!
I need a solid night's sleep, friends. Let's hope that's my gift for tonight. Tomorrow we will start fresh on the big kids' last week of school.
PS I really stink at being a nurse. I would fire myself.

Behind a Glass Face

As I strain and put on

clothes to build

authenticity

earrings to dress the bones

fabrics to feather the nest

turn me inside out

that what I am made of is 

visible and available and unavoidable

spiking out of my eyes and pouring from my cheekbones

break into the sharp plane of my face

crack me like a shell

It distills in the midst, that essence that Is 

thickens and boils and builds in the marrow

while we drape and play dress up

an inferno is merrily crackling inside.

eating away at the chaff

Lunching on whatever is not

Of Substance

the unimpeachable remains behind

skin turns to glass

And now you see Me.

Forever and a day.

*************************************************************

I'm back. Since completing and publishing my e-book, I took a poetic break. And now? I'm jumping back in with both feet. Happy weekend to you!

Clicking replay

My obsession, you must hear him. Yes, I did think about going to Leesburg, GA, if he makes it to the Hometown Visit week on Idol... :)

Oh Happy Day

Cole's Year in Review, The Journey from 10 to 11 starts now.

Last year this time, we were in an NC field for the Bday - having celebrated my brother's wedding the day before. Yeehaw!

 Deceptively calm & snuggly? Why yes. Total decoy shot.

 This one? Not so much. Like luring a small, wild animal, Cole has worked on getting Phoenix to sit with him, and hold his hand - rather than mine. I give him an A+, doncha know!

 Who can resist the dandelion puff hair-do! Let's all make a wish!

 He pitches, he plays short stop, he's the go-to guy.

 Sometimes I am at the school. Did I say "sometimes?" I meant all-times.

 And... the new look is here! Whew.

 Coach Rick & Cole are in the playoffs this week. 

Game 1 - Cole got the game ball last night for 2 good hits, and 2 innings of fine pitching. Today he will come home from school to enjoy his gifts, some sweet treats, and his special request - Carvel ice cream cake. He will also arrive at home bearing New Information, from this week's special series: Human Growth & Development, otherwise known as The Talk, School-Style! And then they send them home with an interview sheet, so they can question a parent about the parent's own experiences in Growing and Developing. I feel a story coming on...
So, on the day the Boy Becomes Eleven, I will leave you with his typical witty remark:

Me: So, this week, for the Health talk, they will separate you kids into a boys group and a girls group.
Cole: I heard that Mr. B will teach the boys, and Ms. S will teach the girls.
Me: Yeah, so that everyone will feel more comfortable hearing about body parts, from a teacher of the same gender, you know?
Cole: Yeah, I mean you wouldn't ask a chess expert questions about football, would you?

No, no, I wouldn't. I think our talk is done.
Happy Birthday, bud, you are a treasure.